Funny Children’s Fart Book – Artie McFartison – The Artisan of Farts

If you’re new here, we’d like to welcome you to Brown Badger Publishing, the only place to you can find my new book Artie McFartison – The Artisan of Farts (actual book seen below on 1st reading).

Thank you for joining us on this journey with Artie McFartison. Please enjoy some of the best fart jokes you’ll ever smell.

1. How did the digital fart get away?

He used the backdoor and ransomware!

2. Why do you have to watch out for ninjas’ farts?

They’re silent… but deadly.

3. What’s invisible and smells like carrots?

A bunny fart.

4. What happens when you create a bean and onion casserole?

Tear gas.

5. What do you call a ghost fart?

A spirit bomb!

6. I didn’t fart…

My butt likes you so much it blew you a kiss.

7. How would you biologically describe a fart?

It’s a kiss from the intestines.

8. Two flies are sitting on a piece of poop.

One fly farts and the other fly shouts “Hey! I’m trying to eat here!”

9. Why won’t the skeleton fart in public?

It doesn’t have the guts.

10. What’s invisible and smells like worms?

A bird’s fart.

11. What’s the ideal weight of a fart?

Zero. If it’s anything more, you’re in trouble.

12. Why did the man stop telling fart jokes?

He was told that his jokes stink!

13. Why did everyone notice when I farted in the Apple store?

Because they didn’t have any Windows.

14. Farts are a lot like children.

You don’t mind your own, but you can’t stand other people’s.

15. Do you know what I think is scary?

Attempting your first fart after having diarrhea.

16. I got fired from my job delivering leaflets on flatulence awareness.

Unfortunately, I let one rip!

17. What do you get when an aristocrat farts?

A noble gas!

18. I just called the Incontinence Hotline.

The woman said, “Can you hold, please?”

19. I farted at work yesterday, and my coworker opened the window.

It must have been bad… we’re flight attendants.

20. My partner said they wanted to heat things up in bed.

So I farted under the sheets.

21. I didn’t fart in front of my partner until we got married.

Their family wasn’t too impressed.

Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoyed these jokes. Please check out my book here and comment your favorite fart joke so we can add it to the list.

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